The Motherhood Evolution with Suzi Lula – Part 1
Posted on June 26, 2017
“Self-care is not selfish. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” – Eleanor Brown
Taking care of ourselves is such an alien concept to most of us moms—something that all of us are guilty of. We know that we should but we just don’t do it. We know intrinsically how to first take care of our kids, partners, parents, siblings (and everyone and everything else) but fall short on listening to what we need to fuel our own spirits. Our dear friend, Suzi Lula, teaches the wisdom of self-care better than anyone else. We thought we’d ask Suzi to share some of that wisdom with us.
1. Suzi, please define The Motherhood Evolution.
The motherhood evolution is “redefining” the way we think about motherhood, creating an entirely new vision of motherhood where all mothers everywhere are thriving. It assists mothers to move from simply surviving to powerfully thriving on our motherhood journey and in our relationship with our children.
When children witness us thriving, we give them permission to thrive.
The motherhood evolution is dedicated to seeing every mother on planet earth thriving. This is my mission.
2. What do we really want out of motherhood? Will self-care—as you define it—get us there?
In my experience working with mothers, all of us want the same thing: a close, deeply connected, intimate relationship with our children, and our children want the same from us. Both mothers and children seek the same thing—we want to be seen, heard, valued, and to know that our life is important and that we matter.
Self-care will absolutely get us there. Self-care is the art and practice of nourishing our heart, our spirit, and our life. When we feel spiritually connected and spiritually fed, when we’re living with an open heart with full self-acceptance, we absolutely feel connected, inspired, and fulfilled from the inside out. And our children will feel this from us!
3. According to statistics, moms today are quite dialed into taking care of themselves. Surveys indicate that money spent on nail salon services has grown 12 percent, hair salon growth is 3 percent, and the women’s health and wellness industry—including yoga and mediation—reports similar trends. In every facet of life, women seem to be leading in self-care. So what different type of self-care are you advocating? Can you share some examples?
While these statistics certainly represent us intellectually knowing that self-care is important, sadly I find that very few mothers have actually created, cultivated, sustained, and maintained a meditation practice, for instance. We intellectually know it’s important, but we haven’t yet embodied that knowledge on a practical, day-to-day basis.
I believe that meditation is the heart of self-care. When we become mothers we need to cultivate a meditation practice that works for us because we are pulled in so many different directions as a mother. Rarely does a mother have 30 uninterrupted minutes to sit down and meditate, so I teach mothers that rather than sitting and trying to “quiet their minds” for 30 uninterrupted minutes, practice something as simple as taking a moment to play a beautiful piece of music, and begin to learn to open your heart—rather than trying to quiet your mind
In my book, I have two chapters devoted to meditation, to assist mothers to find the practical ways that can work for them to create a meditation practice that they can maintain and that will feed them.
Emotional self-care is also a large part of what I teach. Every mother comes to motherhood with our own unresolved issues from our own childhood. The part of self-care that I call “mothering the mother” is also one of the most important self-care practices that we can embark upon. Who mothers the mother? We must!
The self-care that I’m speaking of is something deeper: the practice of caring for our essential, invisible, authentic self—our essence. When we connect to our essence, we model to our children to stay connected to theirs. Therefore, they will stay connected to their true self and won’t have to reconnect with it as an adult. Allowing our children to stay connected to their essential self is the greatest gift we can give them!
4. Can you share 3 tips on how mothers can make self-care a daily spiritual practice? Can it be done without guilt?
Momma guilt is an epidemic in our culture! Once you realize the value of self-care and the deep connection and relationship you will cultivate with your children you will never, for one moment, feel guilty again for taking care of the most important person in your children’s life: you! I never feel guilty anymore for taking care of myself! Never! I’m here to end momma guilt forever!
- I have every mother I work with find a photo of herself when she was very young and find a photo of her children when they were very young and simply take a moment every morning or evening to truly look into your own eyes and your children’s eyes in those photos with the intention of connecting to your true essence. This practice is simple, but it connects us with the most powerful part of ourselves.
- I also have every mother I work with find 5 or 10 things daily that she appreciates about herself and say it out loud or write it in her journal. Start with the phrase “I appreciate myself for …” and fill in the blank. Repeat it for 5 to 10 things specifically from that day. The more specific the better. Make this a daily practice for the rest of your life. You’ll find yourself automatically appreciating your children, and they will feel valued and connected in turn.
- Last, connect with me and Roma! Reach out to us, take a moment to comment and create connection rather than isolation. Most mothers I work with feel like each is an island. We are more powerful together than we are alone. We are a sisterhood. We are a sisterhood. We are a sisterhood! Our time is now!
Learn more about The Motherhood Evolution at www.SuziLula.com.
For those of you in Los Angeles that would like to hear Suzi’s wisdom in person, she will be speaking at the Agape International Spiritual Center on Wednesday, July 5.
Meditation begins at 6:45
Service begins at 7:15
www.agapelive.com for directions and more information
“Suzi is a masterful teacher, brilliant counselor and life line to Mothers everywhere.” — Dr. Shefali Tsabary, New York TImes Bestselling Author, The Conscious Parent
“Suzi’s devotion, healing power and Spiritual Authority is evident in both her teaching and her music. You will be inspired and healed by this ‘Artist of Love’”. — Michael Bernard Beckwith, Founder, Agape International Spiritual Center